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He truly is the man, the myth, and the legend all at once. Captain James T. Kirk became as much of a tall tale as Paul Bunyan or Casey Jones. His actual record on file may be just as extravagant if not more so than the legends that people tell of him throughout the world. One thing that people don’t know is that sometimes this Klingon wrestling, peace negotiating, all fail exam loopholing champion of a captain sometimes just needs a nice bubble bath.

He’ll go up to his room on deck five, lose his regular uniform and replace it with this luxurious 100% cotton terry cloth robe while he draws some hot water in his own chambers. He usually likes to read a nice book here and there or maybe just tell the replicator to pour him a nice glass of California red. That’s the life of a 23rd century captain…well at least until the Enterprise is intercepted by an enemy ship and then it’s right back to the bridge for another stressful negotiation. No wonder Picard lost all of his hair.