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There are some things that they just don’t teach you in plumbing school.

Oh, sure—you learn the basics: how to unclog a toilet, how to repair water lines, how to install water heaters…

But when it comes to falling down one of your plumbing pipes and landing into a totally new and weird world, well, friend, you’re on your own. No matter how well you can lay some pipe or fix a busted faucet, none of that is going to help when you’re being chased by angry buzzards and sentient thorn plants. How will you figure out which mushrooms to eat and which are poisonous?

Or what about if you find yourself behind the wheel of a go-kart on a truly psychedelic race course? You may know which ratcheting PVC cutter to use to cut through certain plastic tubing, but how do you know when to launch a blue shell against your fellow racers? How do you know how to best navigate the slippery slopes of a galactic rainbow-themed track without flinging yourself into the cold void of outer space? How do you avoid a precision lightning strike?

When it comes to this sort of on-the-job training, your studies have been woefully incomplete. Between you and us, you should really demand your tuition money back. But there’s really nothing you can do now except make the most of it. No need to flush all that hard work down the toilet (ha!).

But hey—at least you can always look great no matter what crazy predicament you find yourself in, thanks to this Women’s Red Player Costume. A sexy twist on the standard uniform for any self-respecting plumber, it comes with a red tank top shirt and blue shorts with yellow buttons and matching blue suspenders. There’s also a pair of white gloves and a jaunty red cap with sequins around the brim. Whether you’re facing a flooded basement or a horde of hammer-throwing turtles, you’ll do it in style.